Bad Home Cooking

The picture tells the story, don't it?

Back in the day, a friend in high school watched me make a mess of a simple skirt I was trying to make for the Renaissance Faire, and summed me up thusly: "For such a creative person, you're really bad at a lot of things, aren't you?"

I was. And I remain so. This applies to cooking. To gardening. Relationships, time management, car maintenance, project follow-through, hair care, personal finance, arts and crafts and photography.

I mention the latter because the ability to take a decent photo is a skill every food blogger should have.

Up until this weekend, I told myself that the food bloggers who are known for their photography, such as Deb at Smitten Kitchen, were enjoying the best part of the food blogging pie. Deb's blog is her showcase for her mad mad photog skills (there are times when licking the computer screen seem appropriate) and her extraordinary talents in the kitchen. She has fans in the thousands, and deservedly so.

I'm no photographer, and I can't really cook, but I can write about the disasters that befall me, and that, in my humble opinion, was my own little sliver of the pie, although admittedly the part that would otherwise end up in the trash.

But this weekend that changed. And I believe I'm going to have to do something about taking a better photo.

I had written about vegetable couscous for Slashfood, as part of its Memorial Day Weekend package. You remember, the Sure Thing? The delicious and lovely concoction that will make you a hit at any potluck you attend? Trouble is, I didn't have a photo, and when I went and pulled somebody else's photo off the internets I was told no. I got busy with other things until Saturday, when I remembered I was supposed to fix the post with another photo.

With no time to wrap my head around Creative Commons rules or rummage through Flickr, I thought the easiest remedy would be to make the dish myself, and take a picture.

I made the dish with no problem. But then it came time to photograph, and you can see what I came up with. A new low, indeed.
 







Not one of probably 30 shots came out decently enough to use. I had to skulk back to the internets and find an approximation that was OK'd for public use.

I think it's time I put a little thought into my future as a food blogger. Maybe it's time to get another, more able camera. (When and if I do, Jen at Oishi Eats has the perfect camera bag for me...purse whore that I am) Or barring that, perhaps I should tap friends who shoot, like Elfini, for example, for some tips on how best to capture my creations in pixels. After all, if I'm offering up mediocrity, the least I can do is make it look good.

Would you love me then?

Top five sexiest movies with food...

In my last post I listed some of my favorite books about food. It's only fitting that I list a few favorite movies about food. And in the interest of SEO (Search Engine Optimization, for those of you who don't work in the online world), I thought I'd go ahead and pimp my blog by including the word "sexiest" in the headline.

But then the best movies involving food by definition must acknowledge that food is a sensual experience. Right? Of course right. Allow me to present, then, my top five sexiest movies that involve food. And here's a spoiler: the list does NOT include the one with Kim Basinger and Mickey Rourke.

1.) Tampopo (1985) The scene with the egg yolk burned into my brain when I first saw it some 20 years ago, and I never forgot it. With the miracle of YouTube, you can watch it for yourself. And good luck trying to forget...

 

2.) Like Water for Chocolate (1992) Hard to choose which scene is most infused with pheromones in this one. But in the end, I choose this. Because this is a family blog, I omitted the next part, which involves the sister becoming so inflamed with desire that she runs outside, rips off her clothes and runs right into the arms (er, rather, onto the horse) of a dashing revolutionary. I have always wanted to taste quail with rose petal sauce after this. Just once.

 

3.) Eat, Drink, Man, Woman (1994) The opening scene, of a master chef preparing his family an elaborate dinner, is alone worth the cost of renting this film. The cliche "feast for the senses" truly applies here. The food here represents ties to family, and the relationship between father and daughter. Among my favorites.

 

4.) Tom Jones (1963) The original food-as-metaphor-for-sex scene. Finger lickin' good...

 

5.) Chef in Love (1996) Gotta love them Georgians (Stalin excepted). They know how to live. I can't find the trailer on YouTube, but you can watch it here.

Why isn't 91/2 Weeks on this list? Isn't that the quintessential sexy food scene? I say no. That's because Kim Basinger, with that mouth, could sit in the kitchen burping the alphabet and still look sexy. No need to waste a perfectly good basket of strawberries on such a contrived scene. Really, it was a cringy cliche the day it came out. Or maybe Micky Rourke just annoys me. Didn't he die recently?

But surely there are other worthy films I'm not recalling, nu? Hip me to some of your favorites.

FOOD!

Yeah yeah yeah. I'm working up a post for you. Be patient.

In the meantime, here's a little snack: